It's Been A Loooong Time...

Today I just happened to log on to blogspot to check and see if another blog that I try and catch up on occasionally had any new posts. I decided to check this blog to see when I had last cared enough to write anything and, to my surprise, the last post was August 9th, 2010 and it was about my dog. It is so funny to think that, at the time I wrote that blog, I had no idea that I was pregnant and that my life would change forever. In just 14 short months I have been pregnant, delivered a child, become a mother, left my job for a year, and entered into the lifelong commitment of becoming a mommy. And it's pretty stinkin' awesome and really weird at the same time. I don't think that there are enough character spaces on blogspot to go into what my life is like right now, but I thought that I would give it a shot.

Being a mommy is great and I have a really awesome baby. Sure she is fussy, her poop can be a weird (and smelly) pea green, and she has started laughing like a 90 year old man, but all of these things are endearing because she is MY baby. Although I could spend all day talking about her, I want to talk more about myself because, well, this is Chrisanne's Corner and not Tenley's Corner, right? I can't believe how different things are now that I have another human being to take care of. Before I was pregnant, I put a lot of time and thought into what I ate, how much I worked out, what I wore...the list goes on. Then I got pregnant. Once my first trimester passed, I never met a cookie I didn't love (and devour). I had pizza about 9 times a week and I dreamt about Taco Bell. Literally. Like I took a nap one day, dreamt about Taco Bell, woke up, and before the sleep was out of my eyes I was ordering a Crunchwrap Supreme at 6:00 pm. Said meal was only reserved for 2 am or later if you know what I mean. Because of my bingeing (and the human growing inside of me) I gained a good 50 pounds through my pregnancy. And I didn't care one bit. I kind of liked the attention I would get from people. I would go shopping and, even if I was buying underwear, the salesperson would look at me with glee and ask, "Oh my goodness, when are you due?" And you know that you are clouded by the pregnancy glow when you don't even care that it is old ladies checking you out instead of hot dudes. Besides the backaches, constant having to pee, and feeling like I just got off a horse 95% of the time, pregnancy was awesome. Then I gave birth.

The birthing process was not a fun one. I'm not even going to GO into the details with that one (or maybe I will in another post because it does have some humor) but I remember after the drug haze cleared and I could walk without wanting to scream, I went into by hospital bathroom to see just what a post-birth baby body looks like. I was impressed to see that my waistline was already a bit slimmer. It should have been - an 8 1/2 pound baby and her residual fluids had just popped out- and I thought I would be "back to normal" in no time. I hopped (let's not kid ourselves, gingerly stepped) on a scale a week later and I was down 30 pounds- I didn't even need Bob or Jillian to do it! I thought that it was going to be a piece of cake. Since then, the weight has come off SLOWLY no thanks to me. I still eat like a cow and don't exercise at all except for sprinting to the bathroom so I don't pee my pants. That's a funny after affect of birth- apparently I have lost all ability to "hold it" when I really have to go. Thank goodness I wear sweats most of the time just in case. I actually tried P90 X for a bit and fully intend to get back to it once Tenley decides she would like to sleep for more than a 1/2 hour at a time. So, when she is in kindergarten I will get back to my fitness goals. I don't need Tony Horton yelling at me anyway...Tenley does a fine job of it already.

I notice now that when I am out in public, I am treated differently than before. I have to plan at least an extra 15 minute buffer into every errand or trip because of all the people that randomly stop me to admire my baby. That sounds incredibly coneited, but it's the truth and probably happens to every mom. It takes even longer because they ask me about her name and where it comes from and then I have to explain that no, I didn't get it from a family member or even an ice skater, I got it from a contestant on a morally appalling reality show and then have to deal with the looks of disbelief. So I liked the name Tenley and we got it from The Bachelor...suck it. I'm not naming your kid so why do you care? I am also treated differently by people in stores. I think that when I walk in somewhere with a baby, they think I must be looking for mom jeans and sweatshirts with cats on them. Seriously. For example, I went into Aldo a few weeks ago to find a new pare of black pumps. The ones I have been wearing for the last few years are from 5-7-9 and I thought, I'm a new, mature mom, I should have some new, mature, grown up shoes. When the 25 year old, 110 pound sales girl saw me, she led me towards the wall of flats and said, "Let me know if you have any questions" and smiled condescendingly. Like I'm not cool enough to wear the five inch platform heels I actually came for. I looked at her and said, "Excuse me, beyotch, I came for heels- what do you have?" Actually, that's what I said in my head. What I really said was, "Hahahaha, I'm looking for a new pair of black pumps" and continued to pull the amazing pair of shoes I had been eyeing 55 pregnant pounds ago off the wall. She looked a little surprised, but got them in my size and ten minutes later I had them in a bag and walked out of the store. I wore those shoes the other day and wished I could have gone back in there holding my baby wearing those shoes and said, "Hey remember me?" She totally would have said no, but who cares? It would have been dramatically awesome. I can't help it that the mind of a 25 year old such as hers is clouded with a haze of jello shots, skinny jeans, and working at Aldo. I can't wait until she has a baby and tries to cram herself back in her skinny jeans and 5 inch heels...I hope there is a sales girl to make her feel bad about it too.

There is really no point to this blog except to say that I am going to try to post more (I have some nice friends who actually encourage me to do so because they like to read it) and that things are pretty different since having my amazing daughter. But, all in all, I'm still the same old girl...just a few pounds heavier with a whole new set of responsibilities that are more important (to me) than choosing a bar to go to on Friday.